I started dating Matt in the late spring… and then he spent the summer traveling abroad. Before he left, we talked about continuing our relationship. But, no pressure… we would see how it would go.

Over the 8 weeks he was gone, we messaged nearly every single day and video chatted whenever we happened to be awake at the same time. The 12 hours time difference made it difficult to chat much, but I would wake up to messages from him and it was just very sweet. Four weeks into his trip, little bits of our very new relationship began to flake. I felt I needed more – and he renewed his efforts to charm me. A week before Matt was due to be back, I was excited that he was coming back. The anticipation was thrilling and exciting… but on his return trip he came down with a bad case of food poisoning and wasn’t up to our plans. I stopped by to drop off water and snacks for when he was feeling better, but the moment I saw him I felt a wave of disappointment. It had just been to long and I didn’t know if I still felt as strongly about him as I did before the summer.

It has been a few weeks since his return, and I think he felt the flakes and waning interest too. We spent more time talking to each other when 6 thousand miles and 12 hours of time separated us. We had dinner, but I felt more flakes peel off our relationship.

I’ve been trying – dusting away the hesitation and disappointment…. but I think we might be over. Sigh*


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